thet had gotten the official word late Thursday that they would not be adopting the children

Plans to adopt three Ukrainian orphans fell through for Gaston County Commissioner Tracy Philbeck and his wife, Rebecca, after they arrived in the Eastern European nation Sunday.

While some would see disappointment and grief, the Philbecks insist they will return to Gaston County closer as a family, with a stronger faith and a greater resolve to help children.

“We leave knowing that even though we did not get what we came for we leave with more than we ever thought we would have,” Tracy Philbeck said Thursday. “I thought I was coming to get three kids but I’m leaving with a whole different outlook, a whole different attitude.”

The Philbecks, who have a 12-year-old daughter and 10-year-old son, flew out of Charlotte on Sunday. They expected to return as adoptive parents of three additional siblings, the oldest being a 9-year-old boy named Mykola, who the Philbecks say they fell in love with after he came to their home in Dallas as part of a church program in July 2014.

But another family arrived in Ukraine three days before the Philbecks and obtained Mykola’s adoption referral first, Philbeck said.

While the Philbecks believe Mykola loves them and wants to be with them, he has chosen to be with the other family who had several days to sway the young boy living in an orphanage. It’s custom in Ukraine that the adoptive family take all of the child’s brothers and sisters.

The Philbecks chronicled their journey to the other side of the world to adopt children in a Facebook group that had hundreds of followers. Those followers strengthened the Philbecks with their encouragement and prayers, they said.

He announced to the group that he and his wife had gotten the official word late Thursday that they would not be adopting the children. They plan to start heading back to Gaston County on Saturday morning.

Philbeck and his wife spoke about what happened from their hotel room via Skype hours after finding out the adoption would not happen.

“We don’t leave here grieving. We leave here rejoicing knowing that we had the opportunity of a lifetime to be able to make an impact in a kid’s life,” Tracy Philbeck said. “We’re not mad at these parents or upset with them. If anything our prayer is that Mykola, Sasha and Nastia will find a loving home and that God will protect them and that hopefully God will lead us to hopefully help another child.”

The Philbecks’ plan to adopt became more widely known in May after he applied for a $9,500 reimbursement from a county program that began in 2013 to encourage people to adopt children. Philbeck withdrew his request, and a county board has begun to look at the guidelines for the program.

 http://www.gastongazette.com/article/20150904/NEWS/150909527